Do not criticise!!

1) No doubt, some people bother you by their frequent criticisms. Nothing seems to please them in the world. They cannot notice, in a delicious meal, except a strand of hair that mistakenly dropped therein. They cannot notice in a clean garment except a drop of ink that affected it by error. Neither can they notice in a beneficial book except an innocent printing error. Hence, none seems to be saved from their criticisms. These people scrutinise everything, be it great or small.

2) Anas - may Allah be pleased with him - said,"I served the Messenger of Allah for nine years. I never heard him comment about anything I did, 'Why did you do this?!' He never criticised me for anything at all. By Allah! He never even said uff to me!"
This is how he was, and this is how we should be. By saying that however are not suggesting that you should not advise others, or that you should remain silent over their mistakes. Rather, you should not scrutinise everything people do, especially in worldly matters. Learn to overlook such matters.

3) People dislike too much and public criticisms. However, if you really do need to criticise, then package it well and then present it with kindness to others. Present it as if it were a suggestion, reather than a criticism. Present it indirectly, or using vague expressions.

4) What can be better for you than to say to your wife, who does not keep the house tidy,"Yesterday, we stayed with a friend of mine, and everyone praised the cleanliness of his house." What can be better than for you to say to your son, who does not pray in the mosque,"I am amazed at this person in our neghbourhood! I never seem to miss him in the mosque at all!"

5) It is right for you to ask why people dislike criticism, to which the response is,"Because it makes them feel deficient. Everyone loves perfection." It is the constant feeling in a person to be recognised and acknowledged as being important that drives him. Be like a bee that seeks out scent and ignores the filth. Do not be like a fly that seeks out the bloody wounds.


6) The truth is that a constant barrage of absolute criticism does not prove your shrewdness. On the contrary, you ability to avoid it as much as possible and endeavour to correct people in ways what do not cause them hurt or embarrassment is the indication of an astute person.

7) Place yourself in the shoes of the one who is criticised, the one who is wrong, and think from his point of view. If you were to be in his place, you would probably make a mistake even bigger than his.

8) Some problems simply have limited solutions or even do not have a solution. If a person's father happens to be very bigoted, he tries to advise him using all means, and if he does not listen, what more can he do?

A suggestion...
Put yourself in the shoes of the one criticised and think from his perspective. Only then pass a judgement on him.

Reference: "Enjoy Your Life" - Dr Muhammad Abd Al Rahman Al Arifi

:-)